Adsense

.

.

Neurodiversity Awareness/Appreciation

Neurodiversity Awareness/Appreciation

Monday, November 30, 2015

End Of November

Here is the good news: I made it through NaBloPoMo with flying colors! I posted at least every single day, even on the days I was traveling and on Thanksgiving! It was easy and I think I could even keep it up permanently! Or at least ealternating days. Maybe I could blog on Sundays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays, and leave Mondays and Wednesdays for reading other blogs and taking care of blogging business. The weekends are easy because I do Saturday 9 and Sunday Stealing. 

Here is the bad news. Tomorrow I am going back to Washington. I am already feeling so sad about it. Yet, strangely, as soon as I opened this up and started typing, I felt a little better! But now I started feeling worse. My brain is a tornado. I want to stay with my Mom. I wish someone would glue my feet to the ground so I could never go anywhere again except home. The ten days went too fast! And now I am crying because I don't want to go. I miss Auntie Em and Uncle J and Roo and my fish and Phyllis and the woods. But when I go there I will miss my mom and my dad and Trixie  and my home. 

I am going to see my mom and dad again in less than 3 weeks. I am going to see them for Christmas. If they come out to California, then I will only get to see them for a few days. But if they stay in Chicago and I come back here, I will get to stay with them for two weeks! Also if we go to Bro's house in California for Christmas I am not sure I want to bring Lily, because one of my brother's dogs supposedly killed a buffalo recently, and I don't want him to kill Lily. I actually love my brother's dog, and I would want to hug him and play with him and be around him without having to worry about whether he thinks Lily is potential food for him. I don't know if OP really killed a buffalo. Who even owns a buffalo? The people said they were raising the buffalo for meat. Who keeps a buffalo in their yard and raises it for meat? Who eats buffalo meat? The whole thing is a little WTF. But I still don't want to put Lily at risk. So I would only see my parents for a few days, and I would have to spend Christmas without Lily. 

My mom also wants me to come to Chicago in February so I can help her after she gets out of the hospital. I have to help her remember to take her medicine and eat food and drink water. If I have a job I can take Family Medical Leave. If I am still subbing I can just go, and come back when I am ready. Then I could also come back for spring break, and I could come back for part of the summer. It should be motivating me to work more. The more I work, the more I save up, the more I can see my mom. My goal will be to make enough to save up for a place to live AND see my mom! 

It is sort of ironic that, when I don't live here, my mom and I get along so much better when I am here. We are happy and cheerful and don't argue and my mom is calm with me. Not yelling at me for every small thing. But if I lived here then she'd probably be mad at me all the time again. It is like being stuck between a rock and a stabby knife.

It is almost like I will be starting to split my time between Washington and Chicago, So I should feel cheerful  because I really will be getting the best of both worlds, and the closest possibility to my ideal world, which would be to be able to see everyone. I won't be able to see everyone at the same time, but at least it will be somewhat equal! 

But I am still sad. I don't want to say goodbye to my mom tomorrow. I want to hide under the bed. I want Auntie Em and Uncle J and Roo and my fish to come here instead.

4 comments :

  1. awww.....I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I do think people get along better when they're not on top of each other every day though!
    And I would keep Lily away from the other dog. He sounds very territorial!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Do you go for the rock or the hard place? Or maybe there is a way to avoid both...or tackle both at once....

    ReplyDelete
  4. I know how you feel! I always want to be near all of my family, even if they drive me bonkers! Hopefully you will be able to split your time nicely and get everything you want :)

    ReplyDelete

All SPAM will be deleted immediately, so don't even bother!
If you have a Blogger profile set to allow email replies, I will reply through email! If not, I often reply in the comments section, so please check back.
Go ahead and tell me what you really think! I won't get mad!